Question

Hi,

My boyfriend and I had intercourse four days ago. That was two days after I had my period. He didn't use a condom, and I'm not in any contraceptive; instead, he withdrew before coming (I don't know how it really works). He told me not to worry because he knows what he's doing, but I am worried. We can't have a baby now. I need to know the chances of not getting pregnant and when I can actually use a home pregnancy test.


Answer

"Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge" (Hebrews 13:4).

First, a simple point: if you don't want to get pregnant, don't have sex. Even things like condoms and birth control pills only reduce the odds of pregnancy -- they don't eliminate the chance of pregnancy.

The second point is that your boyfriend sounds like he has had sex before, so you should be concerned about any sexually transmitted diseases he might have passed on to you. There are greater odds of picking up a disease than getting pregnant.

The one certainty is that both you and he sinned by committing fornication.

The most likely time for you to get pregnant is if you had sex two weeks before the start of your next period. On that day is when you release an egg that can be fertilized by his sperm. An additional catch is that his sperm can survive up to six days inside of you, so having sex anywhere from 20 days before your next period to 14 days before could lead to pregnancy. Yet, what makes this really tricky is that you often don't know exactly when your next period will be.

Unless you are having a really short menstrual period this month, the likelihood is that you will not be pregnant. If you do have your period, then you can be certain that you are not pregnant. If your period doesn't come when you expect it, then two weeks after when your period should have come is the time to check to see if you are pregnant. By that time, if you are pregnant, your hormones will have changed enough to show up on a pregnancy test.

Thank you. I had gone for an injection contraceptive. The test turned out negative, but today the worst case scenario happened. The condom burst. What do I do?

Sigh! I can't fix the problems you insist on causing. You were warned that you are engaging in sin. Things are sinful because they cause harm. Instead of repenting of your sin, you chose to get a contraceptive and continue having sex outside of marriage. Every act of sex carries a risk of pregnancy regardless of the precautions taken.

Either you will end up pregnant because the contraceptive didn't have time to take effect, or you won't. But either way, you still are in sin. If you find yourself pregnant, then you will need to decide what you are going to do about the child: either raising him yourself or giving him up for adoption. If you choose to raise the child, your boyfriend is stuck paying child support until the child reaches adulthood.