If we are committed not to repeat our sins, can we continue to date?

Last updated on November 2, 2020

Question:

I just want to ask: I am graduating from college a year from now. I met a Christian guy with whom I fell in love. We promised to wait and remain sexually pure, but we crossed the boundary line of purity a few times. We had foreplay but never had sex. After several of these events, he gave me a ring and promised not to do those things again and seriously start to wait now for God’s signal to go on with the marriage. In the meantime, we would pursue purity.

My parents don’t know about my situation and that I am already dating this guy. I have this sense of guilt in my heart, but I asked God for forgiveness and continued to pursue this guy and wait patiently for him.

  1. Is it fine to keep this relationship from my parents until we will graduate?
  2. Is it okay to keep this relationship going because, though we sinned, we promised to never do it again?
  3. When will be the right time to tell my parents about this?
  4. Is my relationship with this guy pleasing the Lord?
  5. When will be the right time to stop the relationship?

I would really appreciate your reply. This will really help me in my quest toward marriage and sexual purity.

Thank you and God bless!

Answer:

If you and he are serious about marriage after college, then there is no reason to keep this hidden from your parents. To do so would give the impression that you are doing something wrong and you don’t want them to know.

Your relationship was not a godly one, but it sounds as if you have made changes to correct that problem. If you are both committed to living by the Lord’s commands, then there is no reason not to continue your relationship. Not only should there be intentions not to repeat your past sins, but you should also make changes so that these sins are less likely to happen. That is a part of repentance (II Corinthians 7:11).