Why doesn’t my boyfriend want to get back together with me?

Last updated on November 2, 2020

Question:

Hello,

I’m 18. I feel really sad because my ex broke up with me. He was my first boyfriend. We dated for four months. I didn’t let him get intimate with me. We were just hugging and holding hands. He wasn’t really satisfied with that but everything was okay. Later he broke up with me. I was really unhappy because I really love him, and I was sad.

After a month I texted him that we should meet up. We met, spoke, and it was okay. He asked to meet again. The next time we met, he asked to kiss me and touched my bare breasts. I felt so weird, so I asked him to stop. It was okay that was my first kiss. We hugged and I was happy. We started texting like people who were dating. He was always said, “I love you” and all that.

Later I got tired of that because I wanted to know if we were back or not. I asked him and he said we should take things slow. I later asked him if we could get back together, and he started bringing up all the mistakes I made in the relationship we had. He said he isn’t ready …

Answer:

Unfortunately, because you tried to put your entire message in the subject line of the email, it was truncated. I can only guess a few things from what I did receive.

Your boyfriend is looking for someone to have sex with. He keeps pressing for you to allow him access to your body hoping that you’ll get aroused enough that you won’t stop him from having intercourse. Since you are keeping your distance, he is annoyed and blames you, even though it is he who is acting selfishly.

My guess is that he is while he likes you, he is hoping to find a girl to have sex with, so he doesn’t want to tie himself down with you at the moment.

I know your first interest is always special, but he is demonstrating that he isn’t worth having as a boyfriend. You need to find a better man — someone who respects you and doesn’t want to use your body for his entertainment.

Question:

Thanks so much. I really appreciate it.

I’m sorry for disturbing you, but I don’t know why I can’t stop thinking about him and it makes me really sad.

Answer:

What does thinking about a guy have to do with deciding what is right? Of course, you’ll remember your first boyfriend. There are qualities about him that were special. But those qualities don’t make what he is trying to do right.

God wants you to follow the truth, not your feelings.