Last updated on October 30, 2020
Question:
I was told that it is not possible for a guy to stay without sex in a relationship. He can pretend to respect my wishes of not having sex before marriage, but he will definitely get it from someone else and in the end putting both of us at the risk of diseases when we both decide to get married.
Answer:
It is false to say that a man cannot stay sexually pure. “No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it” (I Corinthians 10:13). All temptations can be overcome. That would include the sin of fornication. “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge” (Hebrews 13:4).
I Corinthians 5 and 6 talks at length about the need for Christians not to commit fornication.
“But now I have written to you not to keep company with anyone named a brother, who is sexually immoral, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner — not even to eat with such a person” (I Corinthians 5:11).
“Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God. All things are lawful for me, but all things are not helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any. Foods for the stomach and the stomach for foods, but God will destroy both it and them. Now the body is not for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. And God both raised up the Lord and will also raise us up by His power. Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a harlot? Certainly not! Or do you not know that he who is joined to a harlot is one body with her? For “the two,” He says, “shall become one flesh.” But he who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him. Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s” (I Corinthians 6:9-20).
If a guy insists on having sex or threatens to have sex elsewhere if you don’t give it to him, then he is not a fit man to be the husband of a Christian.
Question:
Thank you very much, Jeffrey.
This has helped me a lot. It had been bothering me for a long time and am glad that you took the time to answer me. If you don’t mind I will be asking some more after I get some feedback.
Thank you again.
Answer:
You are welcome to ask questions as you have need.