Last updated on October 25, 2020
Question:
Good day, I am a girl of 22. I am a graduate and a Christian. I am still a virgin, and recently I keep having sexual urges. I just watch pornography to calm it. Is it wrong because I feel dirty? Is it biologically right for me to have these urges?
Answer:
Having a desire for sex is perfectly normal, but a desire does not mean they must be acted upon. In discussing sexual sins, Paul used the example of hunger to draw a parallel. “Food is for the stomach and the stomach is for food, but God will do away with both of them. Yet the body is not for immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord is for the body” (I Corinthians 6:13). When you are hungry the proper response is to eat, but being hungry does not mean you can steal food to satisfy that hunger. What the body desires must be satisfied in a righteous manner.
The only proper way to satisfy the desire for sex is to get married. “Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband” (I Corinthians 7:3-4).
Pornography is wrong because it portrays as acceptable sex outside of marriage. It stimulates a lust for sex and doing what is unlawful. “For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God” (I Thessalonians 4:3-5).
So leave off the pornography. It is sinful and it is warping your thoughts about what proper sex ought to be like.