My boyfriend said he ejaculated while we were kissing. Did I sin?

Last updated on November 2, 2020



I have a question about sin and would be really grateful to get some help in understanding. My fiance and I were cuddling, kissing, and hugging on the bed, but my feet were still on the floor. He suddenly told me he ejaculated. I don’t know how that happened. Is this a sin? We didn’t intentionally want this to happen, and we feel really bad. One moment I was kissing my boyfriend and the next moment I’m asking myself if I just committed a sin (unknowingly, because he ejaculated). I would be really grateful for some insight and advice on this topic.

God bless you!


Unfortunately, the answer is “maybe.”

First, it is not a sin for a guy to ejaculate, but usually, an ejaculation indicates that a guy was overly sexually aroused. To say that your feet were still on the floor doesn’t indicate anything. It doesn’t tell me your state of dress or his. To say you were cuddling, kissing and hugging doesn’t tell me whether your hands or his were straying to places on the body where they did not belong. What is forbidden is sexual touching. “Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not to touch a woman” (I Corinthians 7:1). By “touch” Paul is referring to sexual touches designed to arouse sexual feelings in another person.

However, spontaneous ejaculations can happen with a guy, though this would not be totally spontaneous since it was an arousing situation. A guy’s body produces semen constantly, but his glands can only hold so much. As his glands get full he gets arouse more easily. If he hasn’t ejaculated in a while, he can end up with a spontaneous ejaculation.

My advice to you is to stay out of situations that could lead to inappropriate things. You should not be alone in your bedroom with a boy, even if he is your fiance, or perhaps because he is your fiance. You are comfortable with each other and that can lead to strong temptations. Don’t think you can resist the temptation to have sex. “Therefore let him who thinks he stands take heed that he does not fall” (I Corinthians 10:12). You are better off assuming that it could happen, so you don’t trust yourself to resist and you take precautions to not make it easy to happen.