Question:
I don’t think my mother likes me. She treats me differently from my younger sisters. She’s always shouting at me or complaining about something I did years ago. She’s always nice to my younger sisters. I’m probably jumping to conclusions, but I think it is because I look exactly like my father, whom she seems to hate. I don’t think I have done anything wrong because I’m always respectful toward her and usually never argue without reason. My sisters always argue and bully her into buying things for them and she always gives in. They also swear a lot. I told them that it is not nice and one just called me a bad word. I told my mom, but she said I was in the wrong and I should stop being bossy.
Answer:
What might look to you as preferential treatment might actually be due to the fact that you are getting older and no longer need to be babied like your younger sisters. With that in mind, your mother may have scolded you because she saw you telling your sisters not to swear as trying to take over her role as a mother. You were correct that your sisters’ swearing is wrong. It was proper to warn them that it is wrong to swear. But you have to realize that since you are not the parent, you have no authority to enforce this. Trying to get your mother to enforce your scolding of your sisters just came off wrongly.
I notice that you state that you usually never argue with your mom, but then you qualified it with “without reason“. Too often people think that their position is reasonable and are unable to consider the views of another. I don’t know what your arguments are about, but I would suspect that they challenge your mother’s authority to be your parent in some way.
If my guess is true, you and your mother are clashing. You don’t see it with your younger sisters because they haven’t reached the age where they will begin challenging your mother’s rules. They are being treated differently because they are younger. You are being treated differently because you are older and have reached a point where you need to responsible for your actions and words.
Response:
Thank you.