Must we stop dating if my boyfriend becomes a Christian?

Last updated on November 2, 2020



I’m from India, where society does not accept people changing religion, caste, etc. My boyfriend is a Christian, and I’m a Hindu. His family is forcing him to get baptized, and I even want him to be baptized, but we don’t want to ruin our relationship. His churchmates has told him to leave me and give priority to God. He gave priority to God, but we don’t want to leave each other. He told me that as a disciple he can only marry a disciple. I am ready to be a disciple but not now. I’ll be a disciple after getting settled so that no one would question me on this because I’ll be old enough to make my own decisions. We have researched that we can date each other after he is baptized. We just love each other! No lust! Only love! Can we stay with each other after he is baptized?


Your note raises some concerns. No one can become a Christian by being forced to be baptized. Becoming a Christian is a lifetime commitment that comes as a result of a person’s choice. Because of that choice the individual chooses to be baptized to enter into a covenant with Christ.

I suspect that he is reluctant because he believes becoming a Christian means he must give up dating you. There is no such requirement in the Scriptures. There are, however, warnings that relationships can pull a Christian away from his commitment to Christ. It becomes particularly difficult in a marriage because the difference in religion will hinder the two people from becoming one. It especially becomes hard when children are born. There is almost always an argument regarding which religion the children will be raised in. The arguments generally cause the children to grow up believing in no religion.

If you both respect Christ’s laws, such as no sexual acts before marriage, then he should not have a problem with dating you. Do understand that while Hindus see Christ as just another of many gods, Christians believe there is only one God, composed of three beings. They cannot participate in any worship practice that honors an idol or god. Likely that is going to cause difficulties between him and your family, and perhaps yourself. Things that you see as being a small matter will be wrong for him to join in.


Thank you so much, sir.